Miss Expatria’s Fun With Search Terms

Darlings! Now that you know I am back safe and sound in the South of France, wasn’t my little tale just delightful? As I clean up my desk and get ready to give you all the travel news and opinion that fits, I thought we’d do a bit of fun with search terms today.

I was checking my blog stats this morning, and found such an amusing array of search terms that I couldn’t help but share them with you, my patient readers who have suffered through a month’s worth of radio silence. Longtime readers may remember the Claudia Bassols era, in which I mentioned the Spanish actress in passing, only to receive hundreds of visitors over the course of about a year who were no doubt searching for her comely visage.

Well, it seems I’ve done it again – this time with Dr. McSteamy, of Grey’s Anatomy fame. I mentioned him ages ago in passing as well and linked to a picture for effect, and out of nowhere dozens of people are flocking to this site in search of something that I’m fairly certain has nothing to do with my story of the Mistral winds of March 2008.

In fact, that’s what I find the most fun about looking at stats – the things that bring people to my blog that have NOTHING to do with Italy, France, traveling or expat life. Check out these gems:

peppers door shop
http://www.radio miss mk.tk
india strange old buildings
crevette
funny taggart gay
claudia kozma kaplan, email address
1970s twa stewardesses
slept with a stewardess on a plane
luxury white carpet
satellites flight patterns
team time
how do princess rooms look like for rich
exact date of moon landing day
“greg sack”

Maybe I will compile all these errant ones, and write a book using them all. What a story that would be!

Of course, I’m still getting plenty of folks who come to see me in search of the kind of advice only your dear old Miss Expatria could give:

travelling from south of france to rome – I know more about this than I care to, frankly.
why cant i find bagels in rome – I’ve been in your shoes, dear. Ess-a delivers.
cute italian phrases – I’ve got a million of them.
marbella photos beach spy – Love it! I’m going to call myself a “beach spy” from now on.
miss tette – This had to be someone from my Gay Mafia.
french shopping sales – Oh! This reminds me, they passed a new law here that states stores can have sales all year ’round, but they can’t call them sales (soldes). They have to call them promotions. Bureaucracy in action!
how to sound italian – Say “boh” and shrug a lot.
how to pronounce i missed you in italian – Awwww! It’s “mi mancavi” pronounced, mee-mon-CAH-vee.
how to say amen in italian – AH-men.
bus from rome to orvieto – Take the train, dear, it’s much easier.
tantric massage montpellier france – I actually know someone who does this, email me!
frascati pork – Yes please!
say italian words out loud – Do it often, it’ll spice up your day.
i learned italian – Me too! Isn’t it fun?
-sci sound in italian – prounounced like “she,” as in “she loves Italy.”
vorrei illuminarti l’anima song – It’s Sole e d’Azzuro, sung by Giorgia.
george cloney é davvero gay – NO HE’S NOT. Leave my movie boyfriend alone!
lascia stare what does it mean in englis – It means never mind, or leave it alone, or let it be.

There now! How to have all your most burning questions answered via search terms. Ain’t the Internets grand?

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